Pandora's Box

Everyone remembers the story of Pandora’s box. At least every culturally literate person. You know the one – In Greek mythology, Pandora was the first woman. Zeus created her as a punishment for mankind, in retaliation for Prometheus' having stolen fire and then giving it to humans for their use–apparently not women, however. She had a box with all the world’s ills and evils. Curiosity gets the better of her and she opens the box and all the evils, ills, bad things, rap music, etc., escape. She slams the lid down just in time to keep hope from breaking loose. Thus, while we have bad things thrust upon us, hope is still present. I’m not sure that a box is the best place for hope, but that’s how the story goes.

Anyway, we had this very ugly wooden deck in our back yard. Just outside the back door, you would step up onto it. It had rows of wooden benches on each side, making the deck just a smidge too small for a table. We first painted the deck when we moved into this house 14 years ago and actually only used it when the kids needed to get up on the trampoline (which we no longer have). Otto, the devil dog, used the benches to look over at the cute dog next door. I was always afraid that he might jump over and that we would have a neighborhood incident on our hands. So, the wood rotted away until it was only good for putting splinters into your hind quarters. In the middle of July, we received a notice of the neighborhood cleanup. This made me think. We could get rid of the deck and pour a nice cement patio. I couldn’t get the thought out of my mind. I remembered that Paul, our friend who uses our pool more than we do, had offered to help out with any big yard project we might have as thanks for the use of the pool. How could I turn down such a generous offer. The next week, Paul came with the boys from the Capitol Hill 2nd ward to tear down the deck. Give teen-aged boys sledge hammers and tell them to get to work and they are in heaven. Great at demolition, not so great at putting things back together. You have to work to their strengths. And this was the beginning of Pandora’s box.

When the deck was gone, all the ills and evils of home ownership were apparent. There was a gas line to be moved, electrical lines to be moved, sprinklers to be moved, along with busting out the 200 lb. cement footings under the deck. Sod needed to be laid, the fence needed to be painted, and you can’t have a new patio without patio furniture. $$$$$$$. I found a plumber to move the gas line. He found that our gas meter shut off valve was buried below grade – a serious out-of-code issue. So the gas company needed to be called. There was also a leak at the meter. The gas company came and went, only digging out the valve and repairing the leak, and I found out later, disconnecting the line to our gas fireplace. Anyway, we did get the gas line buried and the leak fixed. Next came electricians. What was going to be a simple move of the line, became an all day project. We added new outlets, replaced light fixtures, mapped out the electrical schematic in the entire house, and I think that was it. All I know is that it added up to a whole heap of dollars. This is when you wish you were renters. Sprinkler Bob has been up here several times just trying to rewire the sprinkler system. It is finally done, though that devil dog Otto has eaten a few sprinkler heads. We laid sod, relaid it after Otto dug it up. Had the fence repaired and painted, planted some flowers in the pots, bought tables and chairs and yellow-jacket traps, and now have the most pleasant spot to spend my evenings.

I’m not sure I’ll ever go back inside. Maybe Pandora did us a favor after all.